The science of psychology has been studying nutrition and ways of treating complexes for at least a decade, and for centuries at least.

Psychologists interpret this aspect in different ways - they tend to think that complexes are inherent in a person’s character, and that their social center is responsible for the height of the person - parents, friends, classmates, etc.

"Charm Lady" has become a big question about how they are still approaching the problem of complexes.

Historical and mythological complexes

Most complexes bear the names of their “creators”. Since the Greeks were one of the first to study the psychology of people, it is logical that they removed a lot of complexes from their names. For example, the Edipa complex means that the son will be obliged to take the place of the father, pacifying his right-handed man and bringing disgrace in the powerful eyes of the marriage. Approximately the same situation occurs on the side of the mother, if she is convinced by all potential names, hoping to save the son for herself. Such a complex is called the Jocasta complex in honor of the mother of Edip.

Freud wrote extensively and memorably on this topic, pointing to a direct connection between the mental state of an individual and his reactions in the sphere of intimate life. Current sexologists confirm that sexual pleasure can positively influence a person’s behavior in other aspects.

For example, fear and lack of confidence in oneself and in one’s own strengths can change into seemingly downright pressures, as sexual life becomes fulfilling, and the partner does his best to encourage this fulfillment. There is only one thing we can say to this: - get complex!

How to cope with complexes

Depending on the type of complexes, professional psychologists break down different programs, explain all the nuances and reasons for them. Regardless of those who have hardened actions, neither complexes nor innate bitterness, they cannot help but appreciate the influx of society into development or, for example, a changing level of complexes.

If you wanted to overcome your complexes on your own, then you will need a lot of strength and a will of steel, because the most difficult struggle is a struggle with yourself.

Whatever your complex, try to understand the reasons for your guilt. And then work on yourself step by step. If your complex is incompetence, then begin your development in the company of friends, and try to demonstrate an active position in life. Don't lose yourself in the shade, try to get out of the sun.

But the best option, obviously, is to hire a professional - you can solve your problem more quickly, without creating a comprehensive approach that will be effective, without trying to solve it on your own in the situation.

Complexes are a source of hostility, fears that haunt a person for a long time. Every one of us has had to deal with them in life. Most often, stinks begin to show up at school when people first become socially aware. In the nursery, the child is still uninformed; during this period, there are practically no tired complexes. Fears are, without question, present.

In the kindergarten

I remember that when they started taking me to the kindergarten, I felt very uncomfortable and scared. Mom couldn’t help but see me (in the literal meaning of the word) as a child. I didn't cry - I cried. They calmed everyone down, and the manager once carried it in her arms.

It was so bad today that I couldn’t ring a bell. It didn’t suit me that there were their own rules there. They told me to eat and sleep. It was really uncomfortable. I fought against this regime in good order. It happened that my mother came for me, and I was exhausted, sitting on a bed, sleeping from my tear-stained faces. Until the end of the day, I was afraid that my mother would not take me, that I would no longer live here. We were deprived of the fish tank without having spent time there.

At the sports section

Some years ago, when I was in preschool, I was sent to rhythmic gymnastics. I had not yet seen my late mother, so the fears were repeated, and I continued to cry there. It was already more like a complex that had begun to take shape in a child’s nursery. I already realized that it was happening, and at the same time I smelled rubbish.

At school

At school I feel like it’s all gone, like we’re eating white apple trees. I became brave, independent and calm. However, I was at a loss for thoughts. Singingly, I outgrew that complex and completely forgot about my sleep. And, until about 5th grade, I enjoyed life without turbos.

Fear has big eyes

I didn’t give up on anything until this complex became important to me to live and express to myself. I became an adult, they began to invite me to the national days, fun and other huge visits. There, naturally, it was necessary to say a toast. At this moment, I was again overwhelmed by the maddened boastfulness, because I could not catch it. Because of this, I felt oppressed. I saw thousands of eyes that pierced me when I spoke, and put me into a stupor, confusion, and I wanted to go away.

Coma bula, I put a speck

Here I wanted to put a speck. I have come to the point of living in fear and constantly moving away from myself and from people. I started reading a lot of literature on psychology and self-analysis. She began to control herself with her behavior. I no longer ran away out of fear, but went ahead. I started going to all the towns and villages, and I was in the center of honor.

It was really difficult. I fought as hard as I could, despite the rubbish, the destruction and humiliation that I sensed in other moments. I took calming drugs and antidepressants every time, but they didn’t help me.

And, step by step, fear began to set in. Feeling that I could win, I became stronger and stronger. I overcame yoga. There were no more such outbursts. And immediately I feel absolutely free and relaxed. I live a fresh life, with the joy of my skin. I spent at least 5 years fighting my complexes.

Visnovok

The headache that I have drawn from this situation is that it is impossible to avoid complexes, it is necessary to come to their attention. It’s not good to be afraid of people - you need to be open and open with them, the stench of greater humanity and goodness, you can support and help.

There is no need to hide behind your complexes, confront them and take them seriously. We need to learn about them, understand them, and nourish them. The sooner and more decisively you take on them, the sooner you will overcome them.

What kind of complexes do you perceive? And how do you fight them?

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The inferiority complex affects the skin. Food, what to do with him. As a rule, short men are ambitious - they want to be prominent. The girl at school was bullied for her age and thinness - now she is earning money for her appearance, having convinced everyone and herself that she is thin. The unapologetically sarcastic guy becomes a well-known journalist, especially famous for his cleverness in dealing with the most amiable celebrities.

Weak, but wise

Behind the theory of Alfred Adler, the founder of individual psychology, the inferiority complex has a destructive force in the development of specialness. We are trying to either expand the gap that we cannot meet, or to compensate for the lack with other necessities. The most typical butt - a physically weak child, through light training, achieves great success in sports. It’s just as easy to compensate for physical shortcomings with intellect: forgive the weak, forgive the wise.

This is a vicious way, so the pseudo-compensation is called - blackmailing those who are absent with their illnesses, so that they can come back in time and take away the benefits. So the grown-up, rebelling against internal fears, either engages in social work, cares about the poor and sick, or enters into criminal gangs, fearing whom they are even more afraid, not even himself. This method of compensation is influenced by the situation in which a person lives, and most importantly, a family.

The perfect tattoo is just as bad

We are considered to be absolutely hopeless and are immediately lost in the world of adults who appear to us to be omnipotent. Well, how not to get complex with the task that can slaughter flowers and really speaks English! Therefore, the five-digit son of the kidney is seethingly happy when he rubs his fingers with a hammer, and then gets hurt. It’s not a cruel miracle at all, it’s just that it’s easy for me to roll over, which is far from complete.

This is where the boy fades from the all-knowing tata, an English dictionary with pictures from Disney cartoons - to extract from this tat, he knows so much. Children do not need ideal fathers at all. I instruct the reasonable, begrudging, but not the unscrupulous ones, and my little one, to find the right place. A wise father will always know how his son will come out prettier than his son, be it the image of a sunshine with teeth - “like an unconventional match for the world!” - or the team scored a goal.

Sometimes you have to watch the picture: mom and there will be buried fortresses on the beach with a child of four or five fates. Gazing at this beauty, the little one frowns in his eyes, then quietly brushes the masterpiece with his foot, then collapses with a shrill roar amidst the storm of his father’s cries: “What a shame, having ruined such a miraculous fort!” I've screwed you up because it's a miracle and I'll never forget it.

It’s really important to transfer, if someone’s order turns out better than yours. I would like to give my father a chance, or rather show the future: “The axis has grown and you will learn everything.” But what about the elder brother and sister, who are strong and kind? The character of a child lies in great peace in the way in which it was born.

Dear, kohaniy, united

One child easily recognizes the authority of her fathers and tries to follow their achievements and ambitious dreams. You get all the love and respect, and you don’t worry about the drama of “fall from pedestal” when you replace your elder in your great homeland. I am unaware of the painful jealousy of the younger ones and internal competition - this is clearly the worst. Increasingly, it is so easy to obey the laws of marriage, as well as the father’s benefits, and the endowment of great ambitions - of course, the only hope of the family. Wine, as a rule, is better than worries, a child from a wealthy homeland. I am full of joy, success, and accept the light entirely kindly.

The situation is bad if all the grown-ups in the family compete in the fight for the respect of a single child, driven by their own interests and all the children who support their needs - so You can be virulent in an egoist who manipulates people for special interests.

First for everyone

The eldest child in the family practically does not compromise on ambition and ambition. Americans have long noted that what matters is the majority of presidents – both the one and the senior blue. If only one child lives under the phrase: “If it’s not me, then who?..”, living the credo of the elder Swede: “I’ll tell you everything!..”

Vіn painfully accepts the people of the young. The little yard keeper is eagerly pushing his sister-in-law out of the stroller, as she dared to take his place. Five-year - covers with a pillow so that “she doesn’t scream so loudly.” If there are more people among young people, then they will continue to be considered as fathers. Many mothers say this: “It’s great that she gave birth to a brother, we began to respect her when she was an adult.” And “adults” are more than likely.

The elder pragne will save the permanent camp at any cost. It’s a wonderful thing to learn, taking on the brunt of adult problems, for example, earning money for the family. And if he doesn’t bother to save his feathers, he rushes to the other extreme - he quits school and begins to live with his father’s filthy behavior and rudeness.

Neither fish nor meat

The middle one in the family has an unmistakable figure. Everything is given more importance to him through the presence of a reasonable and strong elder and adored youth. Not only are the fathers in command, but the elder one is also there. “He’s just like me,” the middle one thinks, and his whole life is a complete protest against the dictatorship of his older brother, against his mother, who “loves everyone more than anyone else,” and his father, who is better than everyone else.

If the eldest is the hope of the family, and the younger is the lover, then the middle is “an unknown person” who lurks in someone else’s shadow. Therefore, in addition to rebellious behavior, there may also be some diplomatic value. She has to constantly navigate the middle of other people's interests.

Smallest

The young man always has a special place with his family. The chances of becoming a victim of a crime against him are much greater than those of a single child. The hopes of this family depend on the elder, and simply love the younger. Everything is taken away not from the one who is the greatest, but from the one who is the youngest. “Give me a toy, when I’m little and cry,” one can constantly hear the father say. That’s why he quickly learns that he needs to pretend to be unhappy, to force him - and he gives up everything, from pennies to the car.

It’s easy for a young person to develop a particular way of living: you don’t have to do anything. One kiss, another will risk living happily. A young person can easily become a domestic tyrant, burning with aggression and trying to manipulate anything and everything to his advantage: “Mom, I have a headache, I can’t do my homework.” Or to the sister: “Give me two lati for the movie.” Why did you come yesterday about the first night? Of course, I won’t tell anyone.”

One child in the form of “pseudo-compensation” is the family’s burden of hope: no matter how you spin, you constantly bring demands to your fathers that, having deserved their work, they have to do something to study, something to do in sports, and to help them. The tragic aspect of the young person develops, as if he were a “fallible” child. The fathers hear: “They didn’t want to, but it had turned out that way, it would have been too late to have an abortion.” Already the elders are kohans, and it is not possible to renew the fact that this year it will be impossible to get a particularly warm feeling. It is better to simply endure everything, hoping to feel endlessly present in the facelessness of loved ones.

Great copy

The lack of thoroughness of a child is a blockage to the very potential for development. But on this path it is not the fault of the “dogless” fathers. Chantly, every one of us knows the family, where we know, the confession of the marriage of the father - a doctor of science - and instructs him to give a pale shadow in the appearance of a son, joyless, never created, once again oppressed by the thoroughness of the tattoo . In this case, it is not recommended to call the child after father and mother, so as not to “draw him in” into the chaos of confusion.

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When Antoine de Saint-Exupéry said that everyone comes from childhood. In the end, a lot of attitudes are laid, as well as life scenarios, peculiarities of behavior and, of course, complexes that flow into the future. What is this complex? Are there any signs of stench? What does their molding infuse?

Most often, complexes are formed in the child’s life, if the child is already in the water and does not have the necessary living knowledge, formed critical meaning and the ability to stand upright and fleeting criticism of an adult, which is an authority. for ditini.

Complexes are divided into:

​

physical - what concerns our body, its physical features: height and vagina, shape of the nose and other external data;

mental – which translates to the psychological stage: the complex of victim, guilt, inferiority and the like.

Reasons for the appearance of complexes

We reject complexes from those who surround us: fathers, grandparents, fathers, etc. , Without knowing it, they instill in the children a lack of respect for themselves and rubbish for their lack of thoroughness. It’s all good to know the sayings about good lives. All phrases, intonations, and intonations learned by adults must be applied to the child as an installation program.

A child up to 6-7 years of age receives significant adult deities. Therefore, a skin word, said casually, at the moment of irritation is accepted as truth. For example, the phrases “You don’t have anything…”, “You’re rotten...”, “Like forever, you don’t mean anything...” to formulate an inferiority complex, like the equalization of one’s child with other children: “From My dear daughter is a maid, and you....”

Fathers with similar phrases want to motivate the child to read better, behave well and listen to adults. In fact, this behavior gives the child a feeling of inferiority, as well as an inability to cope with minimal difficulties and a feeling of blame for the fact that she is not as good as other children.

The demonstrative sacrifice of fathers, especially mothers (“I sacrificed for your health...” or, for example, “It would be bad for me if I took off two, but I still prepared dinner for you...”) forms a complex of guilt.

Of course, there are no people who seem to have less complexes. Not only relatives, but also the society that gives birth to the child, special evidence and many other factors come into play.

How to fight child complexes

Be sure to show off your children’s rights, show how much the smell means to you, and encourage her to instill this idea in the most “grown-up” diet. For example, when the room is cleaned up, you can chat with the child about how to better arrange the furniture and where to hang the picture, you can discuss the menu for the weekend. Ask the child for the family's sake, especially since she is going to eat a lot of food made from blue tea.

Don’t stop your children from expressing their emotions. Your daughter is obliged to be happy, to worry and be angry, to be confused, to believe and to be afraid - it’s normal, don’t forget that sometimes she looks incredibly querulous.

Do not give assessments of specialness. You can evaluate some kind of thing, but it is important that the child herself determines how correctly she behaved. So you should learn to work with your brain, analyze your words and ideas.

Do not force behavior on the eyes. There is no need to equate the child with other children or with a standard character. For example, the phrase “the girl may be very wicked and wicked...” - your daughter must understand that she herself needs to be neat, and not some mythical girl, with whom she is more and more indebted to herself. Don’t be afraid to show respect, living up to the well-known phrase: “You’re a boy” or “You’re a girl.”

Give the child freedom of choice. This forms the ability to independently make decisions, understand the consequences of your choice, and guide the child with decisions.

Just accept failures and defeats. This is an inevitable proof, very important for the formation of full-fledged specialness. It is important for children to make the correct assumptions about the situation in order to further correct it.

Don’t envy the “bar”: you don’t need to bark a child for a B from a schodennik or even a third place from a zmaganny.

Do not show severity. Remember that the most complex are the children, the fathers who must be in charge and savory, careless and stubborn.

Explain what to change for your ears and skin - it’s stupid: how many people - so many thoughts.

Svitlana Sovela